#36 Are You Losing Yourself in Your Business?

#36 Are You Losing Yourself in Your Business?

If you’re anything like I was for the first two years of entrepreneurship, you may be in a toxic relationship with your business. Gasp!

Consider this your wakeup call. This simple shift may be all you need to keep from burning out.

This is the first episode in the Relationship Series of Feed Your Hustle season 2. We’ll get to romantic relationships later, but first we need to set the stage by separating out who YOU are from your business.

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Are You Losing Yourself in Your Business?

When you start a business, a shift happens, and slowly over time we get addicted to our business and begin to put it before ourselves.

You see it in the kitchen dash where the project you’re working on is more important than taking half an hour to eat a real, nourishing lunch.

In the missed gym times, the lack of showers (or even getting dressed!), the waking up in the morning and rolling out of bed to grab your laptop and get to work.

I see it when I’m able to shift every introspective conversation with Jarrett into a solution to a business problem – how can I use this for my clients, what’s the angle I could create a course out of…

Codependency is addressing the needs of someone else before yourself. And I was putting my business’ needs before my own. 

So, yep. I was codependent to my business.

Always defensive and justifying why it was my business’ bad behavior was okay. “I’m working on the weekend because I have got to get this newsletter out on Monday.” “I really need to pay attention to this right now instead of you because…”

I was being defensive of a bad relationship. Enabling the bad behavior of my business rather than setting boundaries to control it.

Like an abusive marriage, it creeps up and suddenly you’re pushing so hard in your business that you forget yourself.

And I was forgetting myself.

Forgetting the Adria that wants to go to Paris. To Turin. Forgetting the Adria who likes to bike. Go to yoga. Forgetting the Adria who likes to hang out with friends and not talk business. Likes to play video games.

Who is that Adria?

I don’t know anymore. But listen up because I’ve got life-changing news for you.

Your business is not all there is to you.

What do you do in your own time versus what do you do when you work? Those should be separate things. Separate selves. You are your business. But you are also you.

There is a Business You and there is a Personal You.

Otherwise you ARE codependent to your business.

And what starts to happen is your husband, family, friends begin to feel a disconnect in your relationship because they’re only getting Business You. Because you don’t know who Personal You is anymore.

Because Business You has taken over 100%. 

Are you and your business in a toxic relationship? And if so, what can you do?

Because if you treated an employee of your business like you’re treating yourself, that employee would quit.

  1. Start saying “no” more.

    “Nope, I need a day off. I’m going to yoga.”
    “No, I’m not going to work 80 hours this week.”
    “No, I’m going to go to the spa this week and treat myself.”

  2. Write your employee contract for yourself and your business.

    Set boundaries and expectations. What are your work hours versus personal hours? Your work days? What do you get paid? What’s your vacation time?

  3. Reconnect to Personal You.

    My time is reading a book, decorating my living space with color and paintings that inspire me, sitting around talking to my husband, walking around downtown Vegas exploring. That’s my time. What’s YOUR time?

SHARE this post. Let’s wake our Sister Hustlers up.

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Share it to Facebook. Then tag two friends who need it. Tweet it out. Pin it on Pinterest. (Use the easy-peasy sharing buttons below.)

This is a BIG DEAL, a life-saving conversation that needs to be had in our entrepreneur community. Let’s spread the word and remind our Sister Hustlers they have a Personal Self too.


Warmth and joy,

Adria signature



P.S. Stay tuned next week for the next episode in this Relationship series where I talk with Veronica Grant about how to Date Yourself as a female entrepreneur and we dive into dating and the top relationship struggles for business owners.


Adria 300pxHI!  I’M ADRIA DECORTE, M.S.,

As an Architect turned Plant Scientist turned Healthy Living Strategist, I help high-performing driven women who don’t want to choose health over hustle make healthy living part of their business plan.    


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Hi! I’M ADRIA SOPHIA, Message Clarity Guide, TEDx Speaker, and host of the Quiet Messenger Podcast. I lead cozy Messenger Masterminds where I help introverted women leaders & sensitive souls tap into the message that moves them then clearly & courageously share it so they can call in their people…and their next level of impact.